NOVABLOG 2: THE SQUEAKQUEL

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Monday 11/07/16

IPFW Walb Jr. Cheeseburger Review

Aside from the Charbroil Pizza with Cheese, almost every burger you can get from a vending machine at IPFW is pretty terrible.

I was hungry and there were no pizza burgers in the vending machine, so I decided to go and actually eat a burger from Walb.

The Junior Cheeseburger was $2.99 (with tax it was like $3.20 and that's way too much for a junior burger) and for once, I was eating a regular burger at IPFW that was not a soggy mess with weird tasting beef.

The burger actually strongly resembled Wendy's in taste, except the beef was just a bit tough. You also have to open it up to apply ketchup if you want it since it doesn't come with it.

If you absolutely need a burger at IPFW I would eat one of these but with the price I wouldn't really be able to justify it otherwise. It does taste good though.

Wednesday 11/02/16

Pierre Jumbo Cheeseburger

Against my better instincts I decided to try another cheeseburger from the vending machine. The Pierre Jumbo Cheeseburger ($2.75) doesn't come out super soggy. It comes out soft but not necessarily soggy. The beef patty is extra big which means that it's a little difficult to actually get enough ketchup coverage since it extends past the bun. The beef tastes alright, nothing special and still lower quality than a fast food place but it's a fast way to get a cheeseburger. It's like the frozen cheeseburgers from stores.

I'd still prefer the Pizza Charbroil with Cheese which tastes better and is cheaper, but it wasn't available.

Wednesday 10/19/16

Double Charbroil Deluxe Review

With how much I love the Pizza Charbroil with Cheese I decided to try the Double Charbroil Deluxe I saw. The name made it sound like one of those actually good, with the "deluxe" and all but it was not. I think it was a different company, too.

I microwaved it and it came out ultra soggy, unlike the pizza one which doesn't, and since it doesn't come with any toppings you have to manually add ketchup, but the buns melt together so much and it's difficult to do that without tearing the bun. The whole thing stuck together pretty poorly for me and the bottom bun came off easily. The beef doesn't hold up very well taste-wise, it's like stereotypical middle school cafeteria food and it's this weird gray thing.

It was $2.75 and I can't recommend getting this at all. Please go down to Walb and order one of the cafeteria burgers if you want a burger. Do not buy these. Starting to rethink trying random vending machine meals too.

Tuesday 10/04/16

Tony's Deep Dish Pepperoni Review

This is another microwaveable pizza. I was very wary because of the pizza rectangle I bought previously from the Tony's brand but this one was okay.

it was unbelievably greasy as usual but I dabbed up as much of it as I could with a napkin and it was still very greasy but okay. It was tough and not too easy to cut through but I guess that's to be expected when it's deep dish. It was chewy but not soggy. The pepperoni wasn't tough like in Lunchables and was pleasantly spicy. In fact the whole thing had a nice spiciness to it and was sort of flavorful.

I guess it's okay for $2.25.

Tuesday 09/20/16

Hungryman Selects Classic Fried Chicken Review

I like fried chicken, but fried chicken in the microwave is pretty awful most of the time. The chicken always turns out soggy and it's not very good.

So I put this meal in the oven. That's right, I actually used the comical "cook for 45 minutes" oven instructions. Most of the time I would ignore them and just use the microwave because it's always like 40 or 30 minutes but this time I decided not to because it's so awful to microwave fried chicken.

The meal has fried chicken, a brownie, mashed potatoes and corn. The corn and brownie came out as you'd expect, and there wasn't anything really special about it. They always come out the same way. The mashed potatoes were not even as good as instant mashed potatoes. They're not very thick, but I doubt an oven is a very good thing to make mashed potatoes in. The chicken though was actually pretty good. The crust was really crispy and the chicken tasted nice, and there wasn't very much fat or anything.

I guess it's a good meal overall but the 45 minute cook time is kinda bad.

Sunday 07/31/16

Papa Johns Pan Pizza Review

I got a pepperoni and sausage Papa Johns pan pizza because they were only $10.

Usually I associate pan pizza with Pizza Hut. It reminded me of their pan pizza a lot, and it was like some weird hybrid between the two. I think the crust was thinner than Pizza Hut is but it was thicker than the usual for Papa Johns. The crust was sort of crispy and it was actually a little tiny bit burnt on the very edge but it didn't affect anything. I wouldn't be surprised if Papa Johns is still sorta figuring things out since pan pizzas are new for them.

Taste-wise it was the same as a regular Papa Johns pizza, and it was sort of odd having a pizza that feels and looks like a Pizza Hut pan pizza without all the grease. The crust is definitely a lot less of the taste than it is for store-brand rising crust pizzas, even with how thick it was.

I dunno if I'd pay extra for a pan pizza, but when it's on sale it's nice to get.

Sunday 07/17/16

Freschetta Pepperoni pizza review

Another rising crust pizza. Except, this tastes a lot better than the usual generic rising crust pizzas, like how DiGiorno does. It has a pleasant spicy and savory taste to it and the crust actually reminds me of IPFW's crust. It's nice and soft and doughy, while still crunchy. Actually, now that I think about it it's good in a lot of the same ways IPFW's pizza is.

I recommend it.

Prego canned tomato sauce review

I love Prego sauce in a jar. In a can though it's a lot more liquidy. In a jar, Prego is really thick and awesome but in a can it's not thick at all.

It actually resembled Lunchables pizza sauce, especially smell-wise, which isn't necessarily bad, but not something I expect from Prego.

Wednesday 07/13/16

Pepperoni Pizza Funnel Cake Review

Against my better judgment I tried pepperoni pizza funnel cake.

It's sugarless funnel cake with a layer of sauce, then a layer of the kinda cheese they put on pretzels and nachos, then pepperonis.

The cheese was a poor decision and they should have figured out how to put melted mozzarella on it. That would have been so much better. I found it hard to eat after awhile since it was pretty gross after the novelty wore off. I started wiping the massive amounts of cheese off and even then it was kinda hard to eat. I couldn't finish it.

Not worth $9.

Sunday 06/19/16

Kojak's Pizza Puff Review

I was told that Kojak's Pizza Puff was like an oversized pizza roll, so I got one.

It was big alright, and the outside seemed a little burnt, crust like frozen pizza that had been left in just a tiny bit too long. It was very distinctly pizza crust though unlike the tortilla-like crusts in some of IPFW's vending machine selections.

The burnt taste gets overpowered quickly though because as you bite in you get to the doughy, tasty inside. There's what seems like little bits of pepperoni and sausage chunks and it's somewhat spicy, probably because of all the meat. It wasn't messy to eat at all.

It also tasted pretty much exactly like a big pizza roll, which is wonderful.

Culver's Strawberry Smoothie Review

Apparently all the smoothies had an additional lemon flavor. There were strawberry chunks and it was sweet, tasty and thick, but also sour. The lemon taste was kind of overpowering everything else later on in the drink and it really reminded me of raspberry lemonade, but with strawberry instead of raspberry.

Portillo's cheeseburger and strawberry/banana smoothie, Review

I dunno about the toppings, since I don't usually get many toppings (I picked off the onion and asked for no tomato in this case but kept the rest), but the cheeseburger was indistinguishable from a Five Guys burger and it was $5 even. It was pretty good.

The smoothie was flavorful and thick, and it had visible and noticeable separate strawberry and banana portions, probably because they have separate smoothies and they probably just mix both of them together.

Red Baron Pepperoni and Sausage Pizza, Review

I tried a Red Baron frozen pizza and it was alright. It had a decent amount of spiciness and the crust and pepperoni were both really spicy and lovely. The pepperoni was flavorful and the sausage was juicy. However, the meats really took up most of the taste and covered up the rest, so I can't really comment on the cheese or sauce.

Monday 05/23/16

Tiny chicken strip pieces that will just burn, Review

Usually after you've taken out most of the chicken pieces in a bag of chicken strips you're left with these tiny little pieces of chicken that are just going to burn if you put them in for the normal time and some people just throw them out. BUT if you take them out a little early, you can have bonus bite-size chicken!! Highly recommended!

Saturday 05/21/16

Reggio's Pepperoni Frozen Pizza Review

I've had the cheese version of this and remember liking it. It's really quite different from the kinda pizza that Digiorno/Tombstone/Jack's/etc aims at and that should be taken into account in reviewing it.

It brags about a "famous butter crust" and indeed the crust is pretty buttery and soft, in a good way. The whole pizza is pretty soft and the cheese is a little gooey but not excessively so. The pepperonis aren't as good as on some other pizzas but that's probably because this pizza seems like it's supposed to be more moist than others. The pepperonis honestly reminded me of the kind you'd buy at a store to put on homemade pizzas.

Tuesday 04/26/16

IPFW french fries review

I tried IPFW's french fries and they were crispy and hot, and not soggy at all unlike Snider's gross fries. They tasted like Burger King's rather than like government-controlled food. They were like $1.50 too so they're probably actually cheaper than fast food places.

Friday 04/22/16

Making a smoothie with bad-quality berries

Some fruits are just not meant to be put into a smoothie at all in the forms you usually get them in. I've tried to make grape smoothies lots of times, but the skins on the grapes ruin it. Don't try to use weird strawberries either, the smoothie will turn out weird. Actually get either fresh fruit or frozen berries that are specifically for smoothies.

Thursday 04/21/16

Fast Choice Pizza Charbroil with Cheese Review

I saw a "pizza burger" in the vending machines when I was walking around Ivy Tech forever ago and I regretted not trying it. Now, I tried what seemed to be a pizza burger. It was NOT soggy or anything when microwaved, and it was basically just a patty with pizza sauce and a slice of cheese on it. Like, pasta cheese rather than American cheese. It honestly did not taste very much like a pizza, but rather more like goulash. And, judging it as a goulash burger rather than a pizza burger it's surprisingly good for $2.25.

Tuesday 04/19/16

Mini Twin Cheeseburgers Review

I dunno what the actual brand name for these are since I threw the package away but IPFW's vending machines sometimes have twin cheeseburgers. Unlike some other microwaveable burgers, for the recommended cooking time these don't turn out soggy. It's sorta bland but it tastes pretty decent despite that. Also the price is $1.75 which isn't that bad compared to some of the $3 items.

Monday 04/04/16

Littieri's Pepperoni Pizza Calzone Review

I forgot to bring pizza with me and there were no pizza wraps so I tried the $3 Littieri's Pepperoni stuffed Calzone. It advertised "authentic bread with flavorful fillings" and it actually had microwaving instructions, so I put it in for like 1:15. It came out really soft and poofy and it's tastes pretty nice, and tasted like proper pizza crust rather than like Lunchmakers (so authentic bread is right). There was transparent tape on the package for some reason, holding it together which I thought was weird. It smells decent and while it's really soft you don't necessarily need a plate as long as you're careful.

The calzone is pretty spicy from the pepperonis and it tasted alright. The taste isn't amazing (it's sorta like rising crust frozen pizza) and the texture is pretty bad. It's sorta mushy and the cheese isn't great.

Like before, I think I'd prefer the regular pizza for a little bit more money, though it's a long walk to Walb from Kettler.

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